Even though we buy and sell homes with intention, even though we move every few years and are good at it, even though we just earned a good amount of money from this sale a week ago – moving is hard. It is hard and depressing. I can’t ever seem to get away from that feeling of sadness despite the fact that I can readily list the positives. The best I can do is allow myself to feel bad, to know that I am going to feel this way for a few weeks and at least not feel surprised by it.
I have been packing for four days, carefully and without rushing. I got bogged down in the garage on the first day because there are so many big things there and they can’t really be packed – they’ll just have to be loaded. It started to seem as if I wasn’t accomplishing anything so I gave it a rest and moved on to one of my tiny, but many errands. Jerry picked it up a few days later and it’s much more done now, but there is still quite a bit of wood and I am not even sure what we’ll do with that. Move it to Michigan?
During these moving times, I am really saddened by the things I collect, dishes, fabric, and framed pictures. Why do I have so much? I also look askance at the things my kids collect, Pokémon cards, stuffed animals, comic books, notebooks, why do they have so much? As for my husband’s things – well, a giant collection of screws and nails, movies, cd’s, what for? In comparison to others we are minimalists, I know that when I walk into other people’s houses, but at packing times, I suffer through our abundance.
In the past two days I have been more concentrated and thorough at packing. I am trying to shut down a room as I finish but there is no getting around the fact that beds have to stay where they are until the movers come. The same with toiletries, towels, bedding, milk in the fridge, snacks in the pantry. It has to stay until the last minute and that means we can’t pack the vacuum either. It all has to wait.
We have more or less done everything now except the kitchen, which is huge, but I needed to take a break. I’ll work on that tomorrow morning while the movers are loading. I’ll be filling up at least 12 more boxes and making final decisions. Trying to stay focused and knowing full well, it’ll be alright, one way or the other.